Love Yourself First: Prerequisite to Happiness

For many years I studied and shared information about happiness–the whole psychology of happiness. You can get a degree, even a PhD, in Happiness.

The thing is, you cannot fulfill your desire to live in happiness until you create love for yourself. You gotta love yourself first.

Okay, so what happens when you love yourself first?

You create new programs within your subconscious. Your frequency increases to the level where everything you desire exists: the feel good emotions, friends, jobs, things, etc

Everything is energy – verything, including you and me. All things are also energy. Thoughts are energy. All energy vibrates at specific frequencies.

Feel good energy vibrates as higher amplitude waves (think sound waves from your high school physics class) that move fast.When you feel good you feel energetic and happy. Sad and bad emotions and experiences vibrate as lower amplitude waves and long slow motion.

No matter how many techniques you use to create instant happiness you will never stay in that energy without making the internal shifty to love. When you live love everyone in your world will interact differently toward you. In fact, your love will flow out, surround and fill others.

Yes, your love will flow into and surround others raising their frequencies to new heights too. Yes, the way to change relationships is to take care of you. It is never about the other person and always about you.

No one is blaming you–or anybody else–for anything. No blame exists. Not really.

The only thing that keeps you stuck in the muck of daily living is your lack of self love. The same holds true for those with whom you feel disconnected or even angry.

The person who you think you are merely reflects your self image. Your self image reveals the programs others instilled in your subconscious mind when you were too young to filter out messages that did not serve you. those programs, operating out of our awareness, run your life in every moment.

Self love means knowing your True Self–who you were at birth. When you know your True identity, as opposed to the person you define yourself to be, you cannot feel anything but love. You live in constant gratitude for every little thing in your world. You automatically see how the Universe supplies all you ask for at precisely the moment it serves your highest and best interest to accept it and allow it in to create your new reality.

Make sense?

Loving yourself first is not only NOT selfish, it is mandatory! You cannot give what you do not have. Until you love yourself first and become love all you can really do is know about love. You cannot be completely happy or know boundless joy and success without love.

You either love someone or something or you don’t. There are no shades of gray. Just as you cannot be a little bit pregnant you cannot love a little bit. Love carries no conditions. Regardless of what someone says or doesn’t say, does or doesn’t do – when you love that someone you love the person and see him as separate from his behaviors.

Where are you on your love yourself first barometer? Do you know your True Self? Do you participate in the daily communications your True Self shares with you? Do even know how to hear or talk to your True Self?

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Your Relationships, Your Happiness and Your Success In Life

Studies show that happy people live longer, healthier more productive lives. How do you live in happiness? By connecting with your own True Self, with other people, and with a Higher Source.

Every problem you will ever encounter in life results from a disconnect in one of the above three areas—every single big and little issue. Start with who you are being in life and you will automatically arrive in happiness.

Happy people enjoy their lives, no matter what they are doing. They do not limit their fun times to recreation or activities labeled “fun.”

When you think of all the fun things you do, do you think of the fun things that you do in all areas of your life?

Take a moment to look across your life and see what is it that you can do in each area to make each task fun. Some people listen to music and dance while doing the dishes or cleaning the house.


You can entertain yourself–laugh, sing, dance or even learn—while doing many household chores.

Get really loud. Act goofy and downright silly. Let yourself enjoy whatever it is you do instead of dreading those tasks.

Make it a point to spend ten to twenty minutes for yourself everyday. Do something you enjoy doing just for you.

I imagine you heard that Norman Cousins reversed a fatal illness by watching funny movies and television shows.

When you laugh your body releases wonderful chemicals through your system that cause healing. His laughter made him well. He beat a fatal disease by being happy and entertaining himself.

Keep yourself healthy and happy by enjoying yourself. Do something that makes you laugh out loud every single day. What would that be for you? Think. There must be something somewhere.

Maybe you might read a funny story, a funny play or even a joke book. Or step out of your conservative box and act like a kid—play!

Your body and mind will reward you with continued or improved health.

Think this is all too good to be true? Read this book–full of research studies results.


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What You Don’t Know You Don’t Know know what you know, yes?

You know that you can use a computer to communicate. You know how to read and understand American English. You know your name.

You also know what you don’t know.

You now that you do not know how to pilot a submarine. You know that you do not know how to speak Ancient Greek. You know that you do not know how to perform brain surgery. Agree?

There is another category that you probably never heard about: what you don’t know you don’t know.

Into that category falls the items in your subconscious mind that drive your behaviors in every minute. Your self-image falls into that domain. Your money set-point does too. Your style and competency for how you participant and show up in relationships also exists outside of your awareness.

The programs that others programmed into your subconscious when you were a baby and small child determine who you can and cannot be, what you can and cannot do, and what you can and cannot have in life.

Want to know more?

BRAINbest sellerWhat You Don’t Know You Don’t Know: How Your Brain and Mind Keep You Stuck

An Amazon Best Seller for 4 months

Your brain and mind serve to keep you safe. They alert you to dangers in your environment and make you aware of risks in your decision making. In serving their purpose they actually keep you stuck in the muck of daily ho hum living so that you fail to live the life you really want.

If you do not have a Kindle you can download a FREE app to read it on your computer, portable device or phone OR you can send it to your cloud reader–all free on Amazon.

You will find some really useful info in this book. I guarantee you will change your life when you apply what you will learn!
Get the book NOW and read it instantly. It is a short and powerful read. Start changing your life TODAY.

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Relationships Rule rule. But not in the way you think.


Every physical, emotional and spiritual problem in your life, past and present (future too) reflects a relationship disconnect.

A relationship what?

A relationship disconnect, a missing connection, in one of three possible realms:

  1. Between you and your True Self
  2. Between you and other people
  3. Between you and a Higher Source – God, Universe, Source, whatever name you choose

How do I know that fact?

For fifteen years, in my work as a specialized kinesiologist working directly with the Spirit via the physical body, I noticed that every time I clear energy blocks that cause all the issues in a client the “fix” always involved something related to one of the above three disconnects.

When I tell people that relationships determine their well being and success in life they usually assume I mean what happens between them and the people in their lives, specifically focusing on the relationship issues they know about.

But those relationships only tell part of the story.

It is the issues buried in your subconscious mind that keep you stuck. If you could access the causes yourself then you would never need to stay helplessly embroiled in the same pattern—repeated over and over again with the same people – only they have different faces and different names.

Finding the cause (well the history of the cause across one’s life) and energetically removing it’s many facets, leads not only to immediate relief but also to permanent healing – in 99% of my clients.

You see, it isn’t what you know that grips you so tightly.

It is what you don’t know you don’t know that “gets” you in every moment.

Come back tomorrow and I will explain what I mean in detail. AND I have a surprise for you that I know you will like.

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Empowering Questions

http://howtohaveamazingrelationships.comDo you realize how many questions you ask yourself every day? What kind of questions do you ask yourself?

Some questions empower you to move forward in the direction of your dreams while other questions drag you down and keep you down for the count.

Stop and think a moment about how you talk to yourself.

Questions that steal your power and depress your self esteem pop into your head all day long. You make a mistake and ask, “Why did I do such a dumb thing?” Or, “You ninny. Why did you ever think you could do something like that anyway?”

See what I mean?

What if instead of putting yourself down with your questions you created a new habit by asking questions like, “How can I smile even more today?” Or, “What one action step can I take today that will leave me feeling better than I do now?”

Do you see how you can ask yourself questions that focus your energy on <em>what you do well and the ways you take care of yourself to improve your well being?</em> Do you think your world would change if you made a habit of asking yourself similar questions every morning as part of your daily routine?

You do follow some sort of daily routine, don’t you?

Now why would I ask if you do certain actions daily? Why would a routine make a difference for you?

In this busy world where even little kids carry smart phones, self-care often falls by the way side. Taking time to prepare for the day, to meditate and focus within, to exercise – all those activities make a difference in how your day goes.

No kidding. Only you cannot know that difference or experience those amazing feelings until you actually do them yourself.

For me, personally, if I do not take time to meditate in the morning I rarely get to it later in the day. And my day goes noticeably smoother and easier when I begin it with meditation. I receive answers to all kinds of questions in my personal and professional life.

When I skip my exercise routine I wind up getting stiff or achy. Oh yeah I also have less energy. The more energy you expend improving your health the more energy you reap!

Neat, huh?

Of course I include spiritual aspects in my daily routine and never ever miss making at least five entries in my gratitude journal.

While I consider each aspect of my morning ritual necessary to my overall well being and enjoyment of life, I know that adding the three questions that empower and upgrade my life makes a dramatic impact on how my day goes. Even more important, that habit serves to focus my attention on all that is already good in my world – and can be even better.

Life was never meant to be a struggle. EAch of us came here to enjoy all life has to offer. When you fail to feel good know that outcome results from choices you make. There is no one to blame and no circumstances that interferes with how you live your life.

How your life rolls really is all about you.

So what kind of questions will you ask yourself today? And tomorrow? How will you make the difference in your life that you know you really want to make?

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Starting Over

If you are wondering why the blog looks different–it is becuase this site was hackled and the best way to protect myself was to restore it from July 19. AND I eliminated all info about my brain tumor surgery as I feel zero need to dqwell in the past–ebven thought the outcomes was pe=retty darned good!

Enjoy getting to know more about me AND leave comments so I can get toi know mopre about you. Make sense?

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I Drank the Whole Thing

I was almost late as I started choking on the water just before walking out the door. SO when my friends and I decided to go to a coffee shop I was a bit scared to order a drink.

Ah! I drank a full glass of decaf green tea without incident–my one in 7 months.

HOw about them apples?

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Happy July 4th…Did you ever wonder…

http://www.alibierman.comFireworks were associated with Independence Day celebrations even before the signing of the Declaration.

According to Fireworks in America, on July 3, 1776 John Adams told his wife, after the Continental Congress had decided to proclaim the American colonies independent of England, “The day will be most memorable in the history of America. I am apt to believe that it will be celebrated by succeeding generations as the great anniversary festival. It ought to be solemnized with pomp and parade, bonfires and illuminations (fireworks) from one end of this continent to the other, from this time forward forever more.”

If you’ve never been to the Washington, D.C. all day celebration topped by an evening of the NAtional Symphony playing Tchaikovsky’s 1812 Overture, complete with real live cannons, you are missing one of the world’s great spectacles.

Spectacles. Interesting choice of words, don’t you think?

So who pays the hundreds of thousands to millions of dollars to put on these incredibly magic shows? Don’t worry, unless you live in a small town where a special tax may be levied to produce the yearly show, your dollars in no way support the events. Actually private sponsors foot the bill.

Why do you think the New York city display as known as the Macy’s Annual Extravaganza?

Hmm. I understand the importance of showing and celebrating this historic world-changing event. What I am not so due about is how come mega corporations can fund the 40,000 shells of these big shows yet public causes hurt for money.

Just something to think about.

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I Was Sliding Off My Bed

Gee wilikers! I didn’t realize I have not posted here in a whole month! So sorry about that. I’ve been really paying attention to relationships and my How To Have Amazing Relationships facebook page and blog.

I am creating a new video series there and…well, the bottomline is that relationships determine everything in your life. Yup – everything from health to wealth to happiness, etc. And not in ways you consciously know either.

BUT I came here to update you on me.

You likely have no idea that the resulting nerve damage from the brain surgery left me in a state that produces a very unhealthy constant acid reflux. I sleep with the head of my bed raised on blocks. AS you might imagine, a bed on a slant causes the mattress to slide down toward the foot of the bed. I have to pull up the mattress every day or two.

This morning I had an interesting experience. The very excellent news is I woke up singing. YEah–I woke up singing something real loud and weird. Don’t ask me what becuase I have no idea. AND the second part of my surprise was finding I had slid way down the bed along with the mattress.

NOw that was one very different way to wake up, don’t you think?

Tel; us about a weird experience you once had upon awakening by leaving a comment. Maybe you will get someone thinking or even bring a smile to someone’s face–as I hope my own story did.

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Life Just Keeps Getting Better

The secret to an ever improving life is…Drum roll please:

LIve in the present moment and choose to feel happy.

I know that not every moment of life offers something to feel happy about–or does it? If something is a little bit bad then it must also be a little bit good. And if something is incredibly good one could also see it as incredibly bad.

Events just are. They have no meaning other than the one which we assign. Yes, we alone interpret and therefore proclaim a good life or a miserable or worse yet, a mediocre life.

When you hurt in the present moment tell yourself, “I am choosing to feel happy now.” Repeat that phrase as if you really mean–full y feeling happy–while you recall a time in your life when you were indeed happy.

As you know from The Happy Share Movement, thinking about a time of feeling happy actually causes your to relive all those feelings as the same happy chemicals race through your body.

When you live in the NOW then you cannot feel any way but happy. So learn to catch yourself when you feel less than happy, less than calm and less than peaceful and take immediate action to change how you feel. Yur circumstances will shift immediately.

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